Hey Eveys mum,
You are definitely not alone - just look around you! Lots of women - young and old have bellies. I am definitely aware of mine, especially when trying to buy clothes.
Try to think of what you have instead of a flat belly - two beautiful healthy children.
I have two also (aged 2 & 4). With both pregnancies, I had a huge belly even at 3 months, while the rest of me was normal.
So after bub #2, I had lots of trouble trying to lose my belly. At the public hospital where I gave birth, they have an excellent physio who specialises in pregnant and post-natal women. She gave me exrcises to do, but more importantly showed me the CORRECT way of doing sit-ups and abdominal exercises. This reduced my belly (and my 'gap') but I still have one. At least no one asks me now when I am due, like they used to prior to me seeing the physio.
I still do my abdominal exercises almost every day, but what has really lifted my spirits is bellydancing which I have been doing for two years now, including performances. This form of dance is great exercise, but also a great morale booster, because it is done by women of all shapes and sizes. And the larger women always somehow look more sensual than the thinner ones. I strongly recommend that you give it a try - you have nothing to lose and everything to gain.
halyna - blue mountains, mum of two