Pre school biting.

Hi parents,

I just had a bit of a question/concern. My son has just started pre school this month and I'm a bit disappointed in how it's going so far.
He's been going for three weeks now.
His first day, I had to sign an incident report because another boy had bitten him twice on the forearm near his elbow. These were not nibbles, they were purple and close to drawing blood. He was very upset by this and has cried a few times talking about it. When I got there, the teacher there very quickly rushed me through the incident report, not wanting to let me read it and just pointing to where I needed to sign.
The reason given was that my son had tried to join in on a game but the boy didn't want him to and 'has trouble expressing himself because he has autism'.
I'm not angry, my previous work was in disability support and I understand that sometimes communication is difficult.
Today the same boy has bitten him on the hand. I had no idea until I went to sign him out. What happens is, at 5pm, the teachers move all the kids to one room, from four classes of different age groups and there's a clipboard for each class name to sign kids in and out. I went to his room, the teacher was packing everyone up to move to the next room. One of the helpers assisted other mums with kids and bags and we hung around and walked up behind his class to the other room to sign his sheet. At this point, 10 minutes had passed and no one mentioned anything. The kids were ushered into the room and the door was closed with the sign out sheets left where they always are. I lifted up the incident report on top clipped to it, to get to the kids name list and saw my son's name on it and signed it leaving a note that I was not even notified about this.
On top of this, on his second day his shorts were changed due to an accident but no underwear were put on him and he was left free balling for I don't know how long despite there being several pairs of underwear and shorts in his bag. He's becoming upset when we talk about going to pre school. I try to reassure him with a positive and happy voice. And we've practiced that if the boy tries to touch him, what he is to say.
Is this something I leave with the pre school to deal with? It's starting to upset me seeing him with such terrible bite marks on him.

You and your son don't seem happy with the preschool. Perhaps try another or family day care. Sometimes it takes a few carers before you find the one right for you. Its common at some pre school with no undies others its a no no and some have a tolerance for biting but some dont and have strict polices against it including disallowing the child at the centre.

I wouldn't be happy either, it sounds as though the pre school is a bit 'slap dash'.
Are there other options for pre school in your area?
We recently moved our son, he had been going to another pre school for a few months, and was happy initially, but then it got to the stage where he was begging with me not to take him, he is three, and he told me other boys were mean to him. I took him a couple more times, but the last time I took him I stayed for an hour or so and saw boys fighting, and I went over and told them to stop and explained they could not hit other people, and needed to be gentle with each other. When I caught the eye of a nearby teacher she told me that she thought it was best to leave them and when they got hurt they would realise that it wasn't a good idea.
I was really disappointed with this, and it was the last time DS1 went.
He started at a new one last week and seems so much happier! smile

Little Egg wrote:
I wouldn't be happy either, it sounds as though the pre school is a bit 'slap dash'.
Are there other options for pre school in your area?
We recently moved our son, he had been going to another pre school for a few months, and was happy initially, but then it got to the stage where he was begging with me not to take him, he is three, and he told me other boys were mean to him. I took him a couple more times, but the last time I took him I stayed for an hour or so and saw boys fighting, and I went over and told them to stop and explained they could not hit other people, and needed to be gentle with each other. When I caught the eye of a nearby teacher she told me that she thought it was best to leave them and when they got hurt they would realise that it wasn't a good idea.
I was really disappointed with this, and it was the last time DS1 went.
He started at a new one last week and seems so much happier! smile

Im sorry you went through that! It must have been awful for you and your son.
For the last two years I've had my son at a family daycare, two days per week. he made some good friends but most of the kids were younger than him there. As much as he enjoyed going, I really thought that going to a pre school with kids his own age would help prepare him for kindergarten and also improve his speech and such. At the moment, he is happy enough to be there however we've had a couple mornings where he doesnt want to leave the house. When we talk about the boy at home, he becomes very upset. As I said, this kid isnt just nibbling on him. The first two bites were purple when I had picked him up and the second time I was very upset that I was not even told it had happened again. I plan on speaking to his main teacher about this on his next day. I left a note on the incident report where it says to sign that I have been notified about the incident and crossed that out, writing
"Left for me to find". I do plan on taking it up with them on Monday. I guess I just wanted to see what others thought. This will be his fourth week in pre school so far so I guess I wasn't sure whether to give it some more time there. He is my first and only child so I dont have any previous experience to go off. Just kinda winging it all over here haha.

lol aren't we all!! grin
There was also another issue with pick up times, and my son not being included up until the paid time - the rest of the class were having afternoon tea and he was left on the carpet alone. I rang the manager straight away for clarification.
If I was you I would ring the centres manager/owner and ask them waht their policy is.
Let us know how you go smile