Huggies Forum

Everyone's a winner...? Lock Rss

Ok, second post already haha!

I've been doing a course in disability support and education assistance and we got onto the subject of when kids are participating in sports etc. that everyone nowadays should be a winner and get participation ribbons.

I am against this and think people should have something to strive for and achieve goals, but was curious as to what other mums think about it?
Welcome back alecrist. I remember you. Been a while... Lots of us have moved to a different forum but a number of us still slip back from time to time. smile

As for "everyones a winner" Im with you, I think that in some things its nice to be given participation things, but I think that in a competition etc there should still be winners etc. Like 1st, 2nd, 3rd in sports days, Winning teams in netball, rugby etc. Im against the whole "it will hurt their feelings if they dont win too" or whatever. Lol. I justthink thats setting them up for failure later in life!
I think it's fine to hand out something to acknowledge participation, but there should be something more exciting for those who have excelled.
Children need to learn that sometimes people are better at something than you, and that you can't always win. They need to learn how to act when they lose. We're supposed to be preparing them for adulthood. Part of that is to prepare them to not get hired for that job they really wanted/have someone else's idea picked over theirs or whatever else may come up in real life where there is a 'winner' and a 'loser'.

"Parenting is the easiest thing in the world to have an opinion about, but the hardest thing in the world to do."

I totally agree with the comments so far. I prefer commendation than participation awads I.e.Rewarding effort and improvement as well as winning.

I agree kids need to learn that others have earnt something and deserve something more than they do.

Kids these days need to toughen up. When we were kids it was only the few that did get rewards/ribbons etc. so the majority/norm was to not to. So it wasn't that bad. Plus I never remember it majorly effecting us. It's the same with things like pass the parcel these days. Everybody gets the same! Sure we always wished we got the major prize in the middle but it didn't really bother us. Sorry a bit off topic I know!

I think that if you want to give ribbons or something for participation then you need to give something distinctively different for the prize winners like trophies. They need something to strive for.

I too agree with everyone.
If everyone is always a winner then why would anyone bother to make an effort or try to do better? I don't recall being overly upset at school if someone else won something so why would it be any different for today's kids? The same goes for rewarding all sorts of behaviour - it's really like dangling the carrot in front of the donkey - kids know they will get a reward regardless and so will only make minimal effort.
I agree with all of the above.

I was talking the other day to a friend about the party game pass the parcel. DD was at a friends party and everyone got a prize. I think its more special if there is just one winner and one prize. We do a lolly for each layer and then one big prize at the end. Imagine the childhood memory of winning that game?! I don't think its as special if everyone gets something. Its like they just expect it.

I think participation ribbons are great, but kids can not think they can 'win' everything. How on earth are they going to cope when they don't 'win' that job they wanted? Or 'win' the boy/girl they liked? Or they don't come top of their class for something?

Kids need to build resilience and learn how to be happy for others.

Awesome topic smile
Wow seems to be unanimous!
That's crazy about pass the parcel lol, I haven't been to any kid's parties like that! I don't think I've ever won at pass the parcel (when i was a kid i mean tongue ) but as far as I know it hasn't affected me too badly haha.

I hope the world doesn't become so PC that everyone is winner, like someone else said, what about when they're older and don't just get given everything for participating? There will be some adult tantrums i would imagine lol...

Hi Supermummy smile I think the last time i was on here was when the new forum was getting started and i joined but I definitely can't remember what its called or anything now lol. Hope you've been well!
I like the idea of ribbons or stickers for participating, but I agree with boofarama that the winners and place-getters should receive something special.
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