toddlers and breakups how does it effect their behavior

9 months ago my partner and i broke up. he toke the kids and ever since the kids have become cuddlely and they dont seem to wont to leave me.
can anyone help me to under stand this please

Maybe the children feel insecure about the whole break up and feel unsettled with the whole situation. This may result with them wanting more love and affection by the person the feel more close to - you. I'm only going on what I was feeling when my parents divorced when I was younger. I hope this helps.

thanx for the advise its been hard for me because of the whole thing my boys are with their dad and i hardly see them which makes their behavior wrose

Hi,

It's very normal for children to feel insecure after a break up, especially toddlers. Their behaviour may revert back to 'baby' stages and they may begin doing things such as bed wetting or thumb sucking. I think the best idea is to make sure your children know that you love them, try and keep the adult stuff away from them and always reassure them that it is not their fault. Children are like sponges and they will soak up anything they see or hear and most of the time they can't understand whats happening so they make their own assumptions which are usually wrong! Be prepared for the 'clingyness' to last for a while. They are most probably confused and don't know what to expect. Hang in there, children survive break ups and i'm sure your doing a great job a reassuring them.

hi there how are u ok my sister went thow this not long ago and her kids have been afated by this ok i think the best thing is to get chelp for the kids tho lifeline or something like that it will help they kids under stand on what is going on with mum and dada ok i hope things get better best of luck take care for now michelle byeeeeeeeeeee

I agree with Sam's mum. I have actually been through a similar experience. The father of my first 2 children left me when the youngest was 6 mths. I also had a 19mth old. Over the years the children have has to cope with various different situations, where they have lived with me full time, and also with both of us for many varied times. I have experienced lots of clingyness, complete defiance, bed-wetting, "but dad lets me do...", "I don't love you any more", and every thing in between. I have found that any thing is normal for this kind of situation. However, if you think you have a real problem, or see that a real problem is beginning to develop, then talk to a professional about it, whether that be your family doctor, child health clinic, or just anyone you trust.

If you wish to talk more, feel free to e-mail me at lyndal@austarmetro.com.au

All the best

u might need to find out if he says anything bad about you to them my kids did the same thing when they came home from there dads and i coulnd't leave them and my eldest who is now 3 would come and see if i was still in bed at night i later found out that thier father had been telling them i was going to go away and never come back. with a lot of reassurance they now understand that i won't be leaving