Hi Erin,
You are indeed a very brave lady taking on a child (with suspected ASD) - having little ones so young yourself. I'm a special ed. teacher and I work with children who have a range of disorders aged 5 - 13.
Have you read up much on ASD and it's management (Tony Attwood - any books by him are great - also has a website)? The funny thing is, the strategies 'they' suggest you apply are just basic good management that all children respond to.
The shopping trips could 'trigger' a tantrum for the following reasons: 1. It throws the daily routine out of whack. 2. It's sensory overload (lights, movement, sound, smells). 3. Unfamiliar environment with unfamiliar people.
In children so young, their reaction often is perceived as the naughty 'tanty' - when it is actually their way of communicating that this experience is unbearable.
Does he have something that represents security, or calms him by stroking it? Take this when you're shopping. Alternatively, build up to the shopping expedition. How is he with being wheeled around the block, taken to the milkbar or newsagents where the trip is short and you quickly return to home? Maybe build these little experiences into longer experiences to de-sensitize him. Does he have an interest that really drives him? Make up a picture card for him to carry of this (maybe dinosaurs, Thomas) and at the end of each little trip, reward him with something related to this interest area (sticker, toy, sweet, yoghurt). You MUST make him aware that on this trip that he will be experiencing this interest if he relaxes and does the right thing.
Good luck!
Louise
Louise, Finlay (4 Feb, 02), Mackenzie (18 Jan, 06)