Huggies Forum

irresponsible mothers!!! Lock Rss

As soon as i found out I was pregnant. That was it! I settled right down.. Not that i was wild to start with, but I even broke off a fair few friend ships because i believe the people you hang around are the people you become and there is no way im bringing a child into a world where the people around it are immature and dont understand values of life or have respect for themselves or other people. I have now made new friends who are mums and mums-to-be who i believe make me a much better person then i was before! I gladly changed my whole lifestyle for this baby. And im extremely proud of how far ive come!

On the other hand however....

A girl I knew back from school has fallen pregnant. Due january 09. She still acts like shes in high school. Still going out clubbing and partying. Her myspace is filled with immature comments about her boyfriend (edited) and ****ing about all these other girls for no reason at all other then she doesnt like them.

But getting to my point..

Being able to fall pregnant is a gift! Its not something to be taken lightly like i feel this girl is doing. But i honestly think that speaking and acting the way she does, is such a bad look for a mum. Being a mum myself, i think she is giving the rest of us a bad name. People like that ruin it for the mums who actually do take responsibility for their actions!

Hoping i havent offended anyone, Just needed to get it off my chest. =(
[Edited on 15/06/2008 by Huggies_Moderator]

Nice vent. And i totally agree, i m/c in May and a friend of mine is being pretty irresponsible with her child. Which makes me sad as having a baby is the greatest gift in the world.
Well said!

You can't control what other people do or how they act. It's the children you need to feel sorry for. She'll learn! People like that woman are poision. Best you stay away from it and don't give her another thought!

You've done the right thing. Goodluck for your bright future!


Channen - Well said. I totally agree with you! I was very young (16) when I fell pregnant with my son, all my friends were at that stage of partying, experimenting, blah blah blah. I cut off my old life, determined to be a good Mum. And I haven't looked back! I stayed this way for a long time, until my son was old enough to be babysat and I would go clubbing/partying every once in a while. Although it was great to get out with my friends, all I would think about is weather or not my son was ok!!

Some people just don't deserve to have children, and yes there are women out there who are desperately trying to fall pregnant.

This girl you mentioned is not going to be setting a very good example for her child, and that is really sad.
Very well said, I cant stand mothers who just dont grow up, your child needs someone to look up to and acting like a child wont help your child grow up.

Luckly I dont have friends like that.

Good on you I think people who can make those desisions are grown up and mature.

I hope you pregnancy goes well.

Very well said!! I totaly agree.

My sisters friend had her ds last december (i think she is around 18 at the time) and needs to grow up! She is one of the most irresponsible mothers i have come across. she palms the baby off to her mil and goes out binge drinking on the weekends. she apparently smokes pot every day.. and not to long ago she beat my sister up cause she was drunk! no idea why my sis took her back as a friend, but oh well.

At least you are mature enough to weed out the people you dont want around your family and have made new friends smile good on you!! Your a good mum and you have built a good life for your baby smile

[Edited on 15/06/2008 by Huggies_Moderator]

Will 6 July 06 - Jaida 19 Sept 08

I was a bit shocked at this post... I mean I'm not necessarilya "young" mum although I am only 20 and this pregnany was very unexpected. I couldnt imagine ever ditching my friends that I have now just for my baby. Fair enough, some of them may not be the best role models as they're normally out partying every weekend however I would not want to loose them for anything! They are the ones that have supported me the most through the years and you have to learn to take the good with the bad when if comes to friendships. All I've done is explained to them that I dont want my child around them if they are drunk or what not, and they respect that and wouldnt dream of ever putting my child at risk!

I understand that the girl you are talking about is very immature but I would have thought instead of alientating her and telling her shes going to be an awefull mother that you might take her under your wing and explain what a privilege it is to be able to give birth and be a mother and some of the things she should be doing in order to be a good mother.

I think you need to broarden your horizons a bit is all, just because you've had a baby doesnt mean you have to leave all your friends behind, fair enough you'll get a whole set of new friends but what about the ones that were there for you from the start? The ones you flicked away without a second thought? To me thats a bit heartless...

nope.. i agree with the others - well said!
i dont think it's a hearless decision at all... by the sounds these so called "friends" weren't REAL mates anyway.

I like to think of things this way - If you were to move to a new town, how many of them would go out of their way to come and visit you?

I have discovered who my REAL friends are like this. If they're unable to visit - they call (a lot!!)

Trust me I know what real friends are! Growing up with a family that travelled around Australia for 13 year ou tend to be able spot the difference really quickly between a real friends and those that are just there for the time being. And I wouldn't give those REAL friends up for anything!!! They're the ones that despite being on the other side of the country we still make the time to catch up at least once a month or more and take any opportunity to be able to go for a holiday and see each other! They may not be perfect but hey they're human and I love them to bits!

I tend to agree with gypsie - I have 3 really great friends that I've manage to hold onto since leaving school. I've now know these girls for 10 years and we have been through some pretty up and down moments.

Even though my life turned out completely differently to theirs (I left school, got a job, got married, bought a house and have now had 2 kids while they left school, studied, partied, worked this job and that and all remain single) they have been happy for me every step of the way. Yes sometimes they can be immature (especially one of my friends, I can only handle her in small doses) but I wouldn't trade her or any of them in for the world. Sometimes they make me feel like I'm still a person for 5 mins rather than "just a mum" 24/7.

it's good to hear you are being a responsible mum-to-be, your a good role model for all those young mums, you never no you might start a new trend.i have a friend who is about 24yrs old and enjoyed the idea of having a baby but once it came out she gave it to her mum everyday while she went out and did her own thing. i don't think it matters what age you are, it's just there are people who are made to have kids and other's who should never have them.

I have a friend (well used to be a friend) who had a little girl a few weeks before she turned 19. She repeated year 11 so had a baby 3/4 of the way through year 12 and ended up taking the baby from 4 days old to wood, metal and auto classes. DD was 5 months at the time and I was appauled at the idea of taking a baby who is less than a week old into a room with a group of 16-18 year olds and a whole lot of dangerous machinery. She then went on to let everyone hold the newborn, leave it unattended, drink whilst breastfeeding etc.. and I just wanted to take the bub and make sure it was okay.
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