Involving your other child/children

I was just wondering what other mothers done when there newborn was born my son is going to be 19 months old when the new addition cames and i was wondering whether to take a present to the hospital or not will he understand at that age or is he too young. Will he beable to help at all. I'm not sure he will understand. He kisses my tummy now and says baby sleeping but i don't really think he understand that i'm having a baby. What should i expect or not to expected.

Hi Tracey
I know exactly how you feel. Jacob, my son, was about 19 months when my daughter Katelyn was born. I thought that he was too young to understand. I did however take a packet of honey jumble biscuits to hospital so that when he visited me i could give him a little treat. He was very happy with that! I hope that all goes well with the rest of your pregnancy and i hope that you have a smooth transition from one child to two children!! I have been very lucky in the fact that Jacob is a sweet natured child and does not show any resentment or jealousy towards Katelyn. He gives her kisses and cuddles and when she cries he calmly walks over and gives her a toy and rocks her in her bouncer. It is so wonderful to see them like that! It is also a bit funny to see my first baby is not a baby anymore but a big boy!
Let us know how you get on with two children (when is your second bub due?)
Amanda

Hi Tracey,

I guess my situation was very similar to Amanda's, in the way that my first is also very sweet natured. The only time she notices him is when he cries and she to just rocks him.

What i was concerned with, was her getting naughty when i was breastfeeding, this didn't end up a problem but i bought a video of the wiggles and saved it for those times if needed.

I love the idea of the snacks at hospital because they can get pretty bored at places like that.

Goodluck and let us know how things go!!

I felt the same thing, although my eldest was only 1.... well she turned 1 the day after we had our number 2........

She knew things were going on but didnt understand......

I took a present to the hospital as a gift to Lylli (my eldest) from the baby, and before i went to hospital i let my eldest choose a present from the shop 'for the baby' (who was named Leinila) from her.

It worked beautiful...... Lylli brought the baby her first rattle, and Leinila brought Lylli Crayons and a book....... Lylli was happy she had a baby now!!!!

I get worried a lil' cause were on to no# 3.... the girls are excited....... they are now 3 & 4.... Lylli says she wants a girl and Leinila says the only way she wants a boy is if we name him "SNOOP DOGG" LOL......... the girls are so close and have a bond basically like twins being only a year a part they do everything together i have them with me all the time for any pregnancy appointment, theyll be there for the ultra sound and all cause i want them to have the bound with the baby too........ the years apart might discourage them....... but im hoping this does not happen.....

Hi,

That is such a lovely story of your first two girls. My sister and i are 12months apart and are best friends, i hope this is what happens for you in the future.

Best of luck with NO3, hope to hear more,

Tepe

i've had 5 with varying age gaps and i know your concerns!

#1 and #2 are 2yrs 1mth 2days apart and they're close, #1 was just a lovely little man and never got jealous or agressive of the baby.

when i had #3, #'s 1&2 were already 4&6 and very excited, we had dealt with a miscariage right before we fell pregnant with #3 so they were also aware of that. they even tried to name the baby, lol, thankfully we didnt take to any of the pokemon names offered up!

when i had #4, #3 was only 16mths, and she wasnt overly fussed with him, whenever he cried she would plug him with his dummy and sit with him til i got there, once agian, no real dramas. when i had #5, #3 was 3 and #4 was 21mths.

what i do is basically let them touch and help whenever they want too. babies are very resiliant and wont wake unless really poked or grabbed on. babies also love the new faces to look at. the only time i find my #3 & #4 give me a hard time is when i'm feeding bub, but i let them be involved with that too, and often my 22mth old will climb all over me at the same time.

if u let them be involved and use words like gentle and quietly instead of 'dont' and 'no' u will find they will be great helpers and better with bub.

Hi Tracy,

Not sure if you've had bubby yet but. When your son comes into the hospital to visit for the first time maybe let him open the presents that people have given you for the baby.
Also when you get home and are breast feeding or bottle for example have a box of treats next to you for him to be content with. These are a few suggestions that were given to me and I found them useful, hope you do to. Good luck with everything.

Hi Tracey. When I had my second son Ben, my first Jacob was 22 months so when my mum brought him in to the hospital i had a little toy and book for Jacob that was from his new brother and my mum brought a little toy for Ben that we said was from Jacob so after they had exchanged gifts he was pretty happy that his brother had given him a present and after that he was wonderful. As for helping you I just got Jacob to do little things like passing the wipes or fetching a nappy and he soon got tired of helping and went of to play, I think the novelty wares of pretty quick. And just a quick tip for when you are feeding your youngest, just before you start put your sons favourite video on with a drink and some finger food so he is occupied, I learnt pretty quickly that unless they are busy they will try and jump all over you to get your attention or to see what is going on. Good luck I am sure you will all be fine