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  5. age gaps: did anyone else get a lecture?

age gaps: did anyone else get a lecture? Rss

hi ladies,

when DH and i were toying about having bub no#2 last year the unwanted advice started rolling in!

my MIL basically baraged DH about having at least 2 years gap otherwise your cheating no#1 out of 1 on 1 time etc and how SIL had 5 year gap and how it was perfect (she didn't mention that SIL feels she's going to be trapped at home for nearly a decade and has become so out of touch she doesn't even feel she knows how to approch returning to work etc)

my DS is nearly 21 months now and many mothers seem to be aiming for shorter gaps eg 9 months

i was wondering what age gaps your bubs had and why and possible unwanted propaganda you copped from your friends and family?

Hello smile well i dont have # 2 as yet, but will start TTC really soon. My first son is 1 year old.. but yes i have heard the lecture!!! Many ppl just make small comments, but u kno what they r tryin to say! Hmmm i say take in what they r saying but dont take it to the heart if u have ur mind set on # 2. They arent gonna b doing all the work.. YOU ARE!! I kno personally ive always wanted kids close together, as me n my sisters are all 4 years apart and i hated it!! But all the best with everything!! Take care smile

AKA Chante

Every element of pregnancy, childbirth, and child-rearing seems to invite so much unwanted, rude, and pushy advice! People should mind their own business! The fact is that you'll do the best you can with whatever age gap you end up with. At the end of the day, your kids will feel loved and supported, an essential part of the family no matter when they happend to arrive!

Besides- some of us don't have all that much control over the age gaps in our families. I know several people who've accidently fallen pregnant with #2 well before they meant to, and then there are plenty of us who 'will have a much bigger age gap than we wanted, because of factors beyond our control like difficulty falling pregnant and miscarriage. I think if you want another baby you should get on with it- you don't know how fast or slow it will happen, and you don't know that every pregnancy will last.

So just do what you feel is right and tell everyone else to keep their advice to themselves!!!

Ellie, NSW, DD 3 yrs & TTC # 2

Hi Lisa,

I have 19 1/2 months between my girls. Everyone told me that I was mad and that it is not fair to DD1. I think that it is great. They are now 28 months and 8 1/2 months and it is just getting better. From the begining there was no gelousy and DD1 has been so helpful. It is so nice to see her hug her little sister and tel her she loves her.
I think that a close gap is good. They will have the same intrests and will be able to play with eachother. I like it so much I am thinking about another one. I want the same age gap between 2 & 3. That is just my opinion, and it has worked well for me.

Beky NSW, Imogen 14/11/04, Amity 29/6/06

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