Caesarians

I thought having a caesarian would be like going though the drive-thru "Here's your baby, have a nice day!". Little did I know the frustration associated with the recovery period - I could barely sit up (with post-op bruising and swelling) let alone deal with visitors. My bub was breech and had a dislocated hip - I cried for days! Make sure the staff know your wishes - I refused visitors until the next morning when the epidural had worn off.

Good luck with everything.

After having a c-sect I also felt the same as you and unfortulatly had to give up the breastfeeding idea, no milk and a jaundice baby, but to the point of the issue, we only allowed the grandparents in on the 1st day and that was bad enough, I had a horrible reaction to the drugs, I was an emotional wreck, and the camera flashes were disturbing the baby and in turn stressed me out, so next time, I'll need a c-sect again and will ask the same as you and only let visitors in on the next day. To be honest, they're only there to see the baby, so just say new bub will be in the nursery and they can still see him without disturbing you or stressing out the baby. one piece of advice I would love to give you is ... be selfish, and enjoy 'your' baby

After having a c-sect I also felt the same as you and unfortulatly had to give up the breastfeeding idea, no milk and a jaundice baby, but to the point of the issue, we only allowed the grandparents in on the 1st day and that was bad enough, I had a horrible reaction to the drugs, I was an emotional wreck, and the camera flashes were disturbing the baby and in turn stressed me out, so next time, I'll need a c-sect again and will ask the same as you and only let visitors in on the next day. To be honest, they're only there to see the baby, so just say new bub will be in the nursery and they can still see him without disturbing you or stressing out the baby. one piece of advice I would love to give you is ... be selfish, and enjoy 'your' baby

HI,
I've had 4 C-Sections and with my first I was very sick after the surgery and was bombared with visitors I was not one bit up to seeing anyone it was horrible I got so emotional and was so ill (throwing up) and could not more as spinal took ages to wear off. So with my 2nd child I said to my friends and even some family not to visit till next day and most respected my wishes and did this some were put out but who cares its my baby and I've been through all the operation and that so I need time alone to recover. So I did the same with my 3rd and 4th babies I only had my DH with me as he was there for the birth of course, then I had my parents, his parents and our other children visit on the actual day of the birth but not straight away usually a few hours afterwards and not until I was back from theatre, settled into a room etc and felt okay to see them.
So you do what is right for you and who cares what they all think. Also like someone mentioned you can even ask the midwives to not let visitors in I often got them to put up a sign to say I was resting and all visitors had to report to the midwives etc so this is another way for the ones that try and sneak in. Goodluck with your C-Section xxx

So I have requested no visitors until the next day. Everyone seems to be really cranky about it and apparently my mum said to one of my sisters "Well, there's not much she can do if we all just show up!"

I had an emergency ceasar with my 1st and I felt the same way. You could always not tell anyone till the day after, or just tell them late on the day bub is born, so they can't come that day.

My MIL wanted to be in the delivery room - so go figure!

I won't lie to you, after your ceasar, you will feel very tired and a bit over whelmed, but some people can be up and waling the next day, so it all depends on the person. But yes, definately spend the 1st day bonding with your new little one and everyone else will just have to wait - you don't get those precious 1st moments back.

I told my family and friends that I would not accept vistors on the first day, they had a whinge about it (mainly inlaws) as this was first boy in 30 years. They said theyd come anyway, so I told them I was telling midwives that I didn't want visitors and if they came theyd be asked to leave. Some refused to come at all after hearing that and Im glad, because hospital time is your bonding time!

I was so glad that I did, I had a failed epidural and they ended up giving me a general aneasthetic and I was a bit out of it for most of the day (I dont tolerate pain relief medication much and they injected me before I woke up), so I was not in a state for visitors anyway. I had breastfeeding issues too and I did not want them filing through at this stage.

Stand your ground and say "NO" they'll get over it and atleast youre telling them now.

I have asked for people to save visiting till the next day when I'm feeling more myself. It's one day, how is that mean? I want to bond with MY baby. No one else can breastfeed him but me, so while he's being 'held tightly & snugly in someones arms' I'm missing out.

well i have a fantastic family & i adore my in-laws so in my situation it would be mean. understandably not everyone has the compassionate, sensitive, caring support network that i do, so do what feels best for you.

i've had a c/s & a natural birth & i was just lucky that i had no issues with breastfeeding, etc. i know when i had my DD i don't remember being separated from bubs while i was recovering. i know hubby took DD out to show everyone (they were all waiting & i ended having an emergency c/s), but she was with me during recovery & being put on my breast during this time. perhaps you could talk to your ob about doing this? i know ella was born late so they may have bent the rules a little, but i just know she wasn't away from me during recovery.

good luck.

another one here needing a second caesarian.. had a torn uterus n ended up having an emergency c/s with my first so now hav to hav another one! im a bit nervous about it really! will only want my mum, son and my ex there when bubs is delivered. my ex has offered to come and help me afterwards when i cant really move yet so yer.. i really dont like the 2nd day after c/s i found it much worse to cope with then the 1st day

Well seems that I'm alone on this one. No one in my family is being supportive of it, not even DH. We talked about it over the weekend and he was just worried about everyone missing out on seeing bubs the first day. I am so hurt that he cares more about how everyone else will feel instead of how I will be feeling. If DH was on my side I would feel better, but seeing as he isn't it seems it will cause me more stress to stick to my guns then it would be to give in. I feel so bullied. I know I should just stand my ground but my family is full on! I'm the only one out of my 3 sisters who has kids, so no one understands how I can be feeling. Mum has only ever had c/s and thinks they're great and thinks I'm being disappointed for nothing. They really all just think I'm being silly.

is there someone you can talk to about having another c/s? i know if you see your dr they can give you a referral to see a cousellor for free therapy sessions. i know after my emergency c/s i was really disappointed in myself as a woman & everything else & it didn't matter i had a beautiful new baby to show for it. i managed to have a vbac second time round, but i don't think anyone really understood why i wanted it so badly or why having a c/s bothered me so much.

i liked having people around after the birth cause it made me feel loved & special, i wanted to show the baby off & they could pick the baby up for me as i could barely move. but like i said, that's just me.

i hope you can reach some sort of happy medium with hubby & the rest of the family.

Have you told your DH how he is making you feel?? He should be supporting you, not ganging up on you. You def need time to recover after the surgery and to bond with your baby. At the end of the day, the nurses will do what YOU ask them to, no one else. They will get over it.

This will be my 2nd c section, 1st was an emergency and was the most horrible experince of my life. The worst part was that once I was out of recovery my ex's family ignored me and just passed my daughter around like a ball, taking pictures, being loud and rude. Was throwing up the whole time and aparently I was being a b***h when I asked them for a face cloth to clean myself up. Then they got the s**ts and left because the nurses came in and saw the state that I was in and told them off.

This time around, new and wonderful partner, we aren't telling anyone the date, we are having bubba in the morning, partner picking up our daughter in the arvo and bringing her to the hospital to bond and then calling immediate family only at around 8pm when it is too late to come in and visit. We figure that we need time to bond as a family and people can just wait till I am up for visitors.

Hi Penny.
I'm pretty sure he now knows how I feel. I think I'm just doing to no mention it for a month or so and then try to bring it up again. At the moment every time I talk about it I get angry and bitter.
The exact words from my big sister yesterday was "Just because you can't push this baby out of your vagina, you're trying to control everyone and everything!"
She's never had kids and doesn't want any either, so she has no bloody idea!