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Older Sibling at birth Lock Rss

Hi All

My 13yo step daughter (we are close) has asked about being at the birth of this sibling due in 13 weeks.
I guess I am a little weird about it - she has never seen me naked!
I am also worried if she will handle it well. I have researched online that it's best to have someone there just to care for a sibling watching - but I don't want to do that and have even more people in the room!
The only reason I am considering it, is because I was there at the birth of my brother when I was 7 and it was an amazing experience!

Any advise in this area would be great smile
I was at the birth of my little brother when I was 12.
I totally agree - it was absolutely amazing. I have spent my life since then without a single fear of a natural vaginal birth. I went into my own labours so calm and collected because I knew what was REALLY ahead of me, whereas my step-sister (same age as me) came in with me when I was having DD1 and she honestly thought there would be nurses and doctors standing around screaming "PUSH".
If you have someone that could be in the waiting room for her than your step daughter could maybe come and go as she pleases?
Although I want the least amount of people to see me naked as possible I have offered some close friends (1 friend first time and 2 second time) that they could come in if they wanted. Because I have gone so far overdue both times only my step sister has been there (besides DH) as timing hasn't worked out. But I do believe that every woman, if possible, should try to see a birth before they have to go through it themselves.
It also would be something so special between brother and sister! I feel like my brother and I have some sort of special bond because I was there at his birth (he is now 14 and thinks it is disgusting that I was there though LOL)

Thank you Country Yobbo smile I agree, I feel that there is a special bond between myself and my brother too after seeing his birth. I would really love her to have that as she is a really good big sister.

I will be giving birth at a fairly small hospital so hoping I could get away with not having an extra person their just for her? I also think that my husband will say no if we start having too many people there. We don't have a huge support network (I am estranged from my family) and his mum is looking after our toddler when I am in labour so there really isn't anyone I could ask to be there for her that my DH and I could agree on.
I was going to be there when my Mum had my brother (I was 13, my sister was 10). My Dad was there the whole time while we were there (and a family friend fed us dinner, took us back afterwards while Dad stayed with Mum). Unfortunately, my brother had some meconium so they recommended we didn't stay, so we didn't end up watching. Dad was the only one caring for us while we were in the room while Mum laboured. We just kept ourselves occupied, talked etc.

My Mum asked me if I wanted to be there, and I did. It was really special for me being involved that way, and my brother and I have a very special bond to this day. If your Step Daughter has asked, I would say she thinks she can hack it. Maybe you could just set up someone to come get her if she doesn't cope? (as not to take your DH away) I think you'd be surprised =) As long as she brings something to do, she probably won't get in the way at all, and i would say she will only involve herself as much as you or she feels comfortable.

Good luck!

My sister has just had her 3rd bub 6 wks ago and she had her 2 older girls in with her, they are 12 and 15. She said they had a blanket (it was middle of the night) and they just covered their faces when they didn't want to see anything. The girls will tell you they didn't see anything cos that sort of stuff grosses them out, but I think they really did enjoy being there. smile
WE had our eldest daughter at the birth of our baby in 2009. She was only 11 at the time. She had a few things to do in the room and when she was really bored she'd go back to my hospital room. Birth probably wasnt what she was expecting, but she was very proud to have been there. She cant wait to be at the birth of our new baby next month, she is 14 now, and also has plans to be a midwife when she finishes school.
My dd was 14 when I had ds almost 4yrs ago. I never even considered having her there for the birth. I guess in my mind I wouldnt want her to see me going through all that. Too traumatising maybe. Thats just my thoughts though.

I think it's lovely that she's asked to be there, if she's keen then why not let her witness her sibling being born. I can understand the awkwardness of having her see you naked, but you say you guys are close, I think this will only strengthen your bond more.

Perhaps allow her to bring in some distraction activities if she feels she needs a break, like a DS or tablet or something. Even headphones so she can block out any swearing/screaming when it's go time wink
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