Please help. I have a 2 year old baby. My Husband is a childish, selfish, irresponsible brat. He spends money irresponsibly (he took out a secret personal loan 6 months ago for 5k and i have no idea what he spent it on but he doesn't know that i know - he also puts things like buying lunches and toys etc before paying bills). He has depression, and we go through stages where he won't get out of bed and is completely horrible to me but he uses lack of money to avoid getting help. He gets sex at least once a week but subtly complains or makes me feel bad/puts the pressure on as soon as we hit the 5 day mark - and then complains that its not exciting enough so consequently the thought of sex just pisses me off. He blames me or someone else for anything that goes wrong, it is never ever his fault, or if it is his fault, then someone else drove him to it. He has no problem yelling at me in front of our daughter but then gets angry and sullen when she wont go near him. When i confront him over anything he dismisses my concerns or by the end of the conversation/argument I feel like he's a massive victim and that i'm a horrible person and everyone has screwed him over. The list of crap like this goes on.
But then...
He is also very generous, and loving, he says he loves me more than anything and hes petrified of me leaving him. He loves our daughter so very much. He doesn't care about my appearance, or my stretch marks etc, his family are amazing and lovely. He would be completely lost without me - and he would be painful with divorce/custody proceedings. I do love him, but I'm at the point where I can barely stand living with him, and I cant explain to him what needs to change - he either wont listen or doesn't agree. I'm not concerned about my welfare as I have a good job and I have a good support network and somewhere to go if i do decide to leave - our daughter will never go without from my side of things. But he doesn't really have those things. Im happy for him to keep the house, and I don't want any money from him. He also knows that I will never ever stop him from seeing our daughter.

Does anyone have experience with someone like this? what did you do? How did you get through it, or how did you go about leaving?