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Being a stay home mum or going back to work part time? Rss

Hi everyone,
I'm finding it difficult to make this decision.
I have placed my 17 month old son in daycare in preparation of returning back to work 2 days a week soon.
He has been in daycare for 5 weeks now. Since day one he and I have been sick. Is it worth me leaving him in daycare or should I just be a stay home mum?
The money really is not a big issue but I have been in my job for over 18 years. But is it time for me to give it all away and do the most important job of my life and raise my son?
I am 36 yrs old and do not want a career anymore and I am only going back because my job pays well and the conditions are good. But are they good enough reasons to subject my son to constant sickness? Please give me some advice so I can make this decision once and for all and give me peace of mind.

Jungle baby

Hi

I am a stay at hom mum and i would not have it any other way, although somedays I crave adult conversation.

Maybe it's time for a new chapter in your life, you could alway start a business from home you you feel the need.
I want to say what someone said to me when I was deciding to go onto Formula What ever makes you happy, a happy mother is a happy baby.

Good luck on whatever you decide

Tineka

Tineka, Mum to Hamish 3yrs, Abby 1yr & 1due 10/04

This post has been edited by the moderator.
Hi Jungle,

Here's another perspective!

I had 4 months off after the birth of both my children, and then returned to two days part time! I am fortunate though that my husband works on a rotating roster, and i only need a babysitter one third of the time. My 2 and 9months old daughter has now been in preschool for 5 months two days a week.

This works wonderfully for us! My daughter just loves preschool, and most mornings asks if it is a school day! I get my break, from the ordinary routine of home, and my son spends time with his Aunty, or either grandparents! I can't justify going out all the time for a break, so work is MY break!

I realise that you may not have a choice for babysitting, but day care has a lot of advantages too! The sickness thing will pass as he builds up some tolerance to the colds! My daughter went thru this for a little while too, but now hasn't been sick at all for months!

You can still do the most important job in the world of being a great mother and go back to work! It is really up to you!

Best of luck in your decision, I would love to hear how you go,

Tepe

DD5, DS3, DS lost to SIDS at 6mths & DD6m

Hi Tepe,
Thanks for your persective on this issue.
I will give it a go and then make up my mind.
I would love to stay home for my son and open a different path in my life. I have take 1 1/2 yrs off already and do not miss going back. I totally enjoy being a mum but in the back of my mind I know that I will be back in the workforce eventually when my son is older.
Great advice thanks again.

Jungle baby

Thanks gals for your advice.
Raising my son is the most important job at the moment and having money to do this in the future is also important.
More food for thought.
It's great to hear that this issue is not clear cut and I'm getting advice from both sides of the fence. Working mum and stay home mum.
Thanks again.
You guys are great.

Jungle baby

Hello Jungle Baby

Its not an easy decision for you I wish you all the best!

You have to do what is right for you and your family!

Best of luck

Melissa

melissa, vic, Patrick 2.5 & Laura 15 months

Hi Jungle Baby,

I would just like to say do what you think is right for you and your son. Some mothers need to go back to work because they thrive and are at their best when in the workforce. Other mothers are at their best being at home full time.

I am a bit of both. I have two girls aged 2 and 1. I have managed to combine staying at home with my girls during the day. Then I go to work at night 2 to 5 nights a week, depending. This is also not an easy choice. But at least I get to spend all day with them and I only miss putting them to bed 2 or so nights a week.

Anyway whatever you decide it will not be a wrong decision because it will be to the benefit of you and your son.

Good luck.

QLD DD 2/02 DD 3/03 DD 2/05 Jack 23/3/07

Hi
It's a difficult question isn't it? I am currently doing the stay at home Mum thing and am intending to do this until my son and the new baby start at school. Sure we could use the extra money, but I am enjoying watching him develop (and am sure I will get the same enjoyment out of our second child).
I have decided I want to retrain before I revisit the workforce as I was a callcentre rep and can't face that again! I am currently quite happy at home, but I know some mum's really need the interaction at work to be better focused at home. If you need that, go for it, if you need it and don't do it you could find the quality of time with your child is reduced, and believe me, quality is very important!
Best of luck, whatever you decide. smile

Rachelle, NZ, son George 10.12.02, Ian 15.06.04

Hi jungle
i know exactly how you feel
you said eventually you will have to go back to work .

but

you just want to keep 1 foot in the door for your job, and also for your independence.
for so many years you have relied on nobody but yourself. and now your life has changed,and in the back of your mind you dont want to completly let go of your pre-baby life.
i dont have to go back to work until november04 but i have always said i would be a stay at home mum , but at the same time i want to go back to work. i think it would make me feel better if i had a bit of freedom with money, but its just a bit harder on 1 wage.

so i guess i will stop babbling now. just wanted to share my opinion with you.

DD 13/11/03 -DD 11.11.05 - DS 17.4.08

HI,
Keep in mind that Autumn always brings on the start of the cold and flu season. My daughter who is at home, has been sick twice in the past 6 weeks with a throat infection and flu.

My daughter is 14 months old and I returned to work last week (full time). My dad lives with us and he looks after her every day. I'm about to put her into day care 2 days a week for the interaction with other kids as well as mental stimulation because she is learning at a rapid pace.

I enjoy being at home and I enjoy working, however, my job doesn't cater for part time work.

As everone else has said, do what makes you happy and follow your gut instinct.
Hi Jungle

I placed my son in preschool 1 day a week to help develop his delayed speech when he turned 3 and had to pull him back out again. He has ear problems and had gommets in at 1 1/2 years old. Preschool was making him that sick that I had to pull him out because it was making his ears worse.
At one stage he got sick 5 weeks in a row. Each week I had just got him better before he went back and then he got sick again.
I was appaulled by this preschool. At times he would come home with other peoples half eaten lunch in his lunch box. I thought to myself are these children being supervised properly?
When I picked my son up at lunch time once I saw them pick food off the ground and give it back to the child.
The childcare centres are meant to refuse to take care of children that are sick but they don't.
The 10 months that my son was in preschool I would say that he was sick 8 days out of ten.

mum of 3

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