Having been around kids all my life I thought I knew what to expect when I had my little boy in Feb 02. Nothing, absolutely nothing could have prepared me for the reality of bringing him home. You are right to be scared and for good reason. It is a huge responsiblity having a child. I think I had rose coloured glasses on when I was pregnant. The first few months are hard because you are so new to it. If you have a mum or close friend who is also a mum, listen to their advice. You don't have to take it, but just listen. Share the baby with your family and take time out for yourself without feeling guilty. You are so important to your baby so by rejuvenating yourself you are helping your baby. You didn't mention if you have a partner but if you do, make them help. Don't winge and complain that they don't help. Make them help, it is their child too. After about 9 months things fall into place. After 12 months you start to get some of your life back. I am fast approaching 18 months and looking forward to taking him to all those kiddie gyms. Life is finally looking up - it all takes time. Good luck.