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Hi, - If anyone has any suggestions to help me I would be forever grateful!!!

My son, Zac is 13 months old and has only ever slept through the night a handfull of times. His longest stretch on average is about 4 hours.. - I am soo sleep deprived ughh... but that's not just where the problem starts!!! - To get him to sleep takes FOREVER - he used to be so good; - I could put him into his cot.. - say 'goodnight, etc' and walk out and he would go to sleep; but it has all turned to custard: - he wont let me leave the room; and screams the house down if I try exiting before he is in a deep sleep.

He is EXTREMELY sensitive to noise and seems to wake at the drop of a pin... I follow a routine; (he has a day sleep, a bedtime bath/wind down routine, etc) but it seems to not make an ounce of difference. I have tried controlled crying; - but this didn't help either. I don't believe in leaving him to cry until he passes out with exhaustion... as some have suggested.... but there MUST be some other way. Help!!!!

Your suggestions would be Greatly appreciated.
Hi there,

I don't have any useful suggestions for you but you sounded so desperate that I just couldn't help reply. And give you some support.

My sister-in-law has a daughter who is 2 and is only just sleeping through the night ( mind you she is up at 5am) I know this doesn't sound encouraging but all I can say is stick with him, it won't last forever (although it seems it at the time) We had heaps of trouble with my first son (now 3) and we too tried the controlled crying to no avail. Once we decided that this was the way it was going to be and we would have to ride it out, we stopped stressing about the situation and about a month later he decided he could settle himself. He just didn't want us making the decision for him.

So my advice is your doing a fantastic job, he will grow out of it when he is ready.
Maybe while your waiting for him to get into his deep sleep you could make yourself a nice cuppa and a magazine or book and just sit in the room with him.

Hope it works out for you soon.

Hi - Thanks for your reply. It's support like yours that remind me of how precious he is and helps the frustration to subside (for tonight anyway haha..).

The silly thing is that as wearisome as it can sometimes get, - it is also very lovely that he just wants mummy there.

I do worry that I am not teaching him that at night time you sleep, and that by going in and rocking him, that perhaps he thinks that is just what you do..? - I probably overthink too much....

I just hope it gets better before no. 2 comes along!!

Hi again,

As long as he knows you are there I am sure he will get the hang of it sooner or later. Its so hard at the time, I've spent the last hour in and out of my 3yr olds room telling him to go to sleep.... sometimes they just fight it.

Are you pregnant with your second? Don't worry with the second one I am sure it will be an angel, at least I know I have been blessed with an angel (sleep wise) this time round. Well he really doesn't have much choice but to self settle as you are busy with no1. Mind you I am so glad I experienced the difficulties with no1 (even if we didn't know what the hell we were doing at the time) it makes it so much easier second time round and I really appreciate how easy no 2 is.

I hope it doesn't sound like favouritism.......

Take care, and I hope its not too premature of me to say congratulations....

I agree - babies seem to do their own thing in their own time. I have been having lots of problems with my baby and sleeping - went to Tresillian at 5 months which sorted things for a couple of months, then he learnt to stand and sit and since Xmas sleeping has gone out the window as all he wants to do is stand and play in the cot. It is getting better (after 6 weeks) and he did sleep through the night 1 time this week (heaven!)...
While I dont agree with all Tresillian's advice the best thing that worked for me - instead of rocking to sleep, was trying to settle him in the cot. I'd turn him away from me onto his side and pat his bum or stroke his back (or whatever your baby likes), apparently you arent supposed to do this til they go to sleep, but only to they settle, however at night after a bout of crying, I found patting him off to sleep to be very helpful smile Sometimes it wouldnt work, but most of the time it helps. And once you are less sleep deprived, then perhaps just settle your baby like that til he is calm and then let him put himself to sleep - staying in the room since that seems to help at first....

This is just my thoughts anyway on what helped for my bub.

Of course this doesnt help him any more as all he wants to do is stand!!! And he is happy with this! However when he was upset, the lieing down and patting did work...

Good luck... And there are alot of us out here that have non-sleeping babies! We should start a club really!!!

Suz, NSW

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