Cant get dad to anything please help if you can

[magisam]

Im in tears reding this i really sympathise with you and the other mums who are going through the same situation. i too am having the same problem with my husband who promised me that he was going to be a hands on dad and not leave everything to me when we started trying for our son who is now 2 months. and i feel so bad that after 2 months of putting up with him i have no advice to offer. i have tried every thing asking him to do things leaving bubs with him, only to come home to find bubs left in the bouncer wide awake and him on the internet with every thing ending up in an argument. today is the last straw, im soo sick and have asked him to look after him for one day, a saturday! after every thing i do and every thing i went through to bring our beautiful son in to the world i would not of thought that one day would be too much to ask... yet here i am looking after my son still, sorry about the vent there. all i can say is thank you to huggies for this forum were we can at least know were not alone and hopefully hear stories of people making it out the other side ok and can talk to each other for a bit of support... even though we deserve more!

[uptowngirl]

Ok so I wrote in here back in April, I am happy to say that there is light at the end of the tunnel It has taken some time but finally he is coming through, although not perfect but a definite improvement.

I can only say what we did and not that it will work for everyone but I made sure that DH was given all the tools to succeed.

This sounds silly and I know we are the ones who have to go head first in to parenthood however I did find sugar coating it a bit for him worked. For instance if I wanted him to feed DD then I would prepare it and get her ready then stick the high chair in front of him. That way the hard scary part was over with. Other times I would barter with him, if I change her nappy can you please put the clothes I have out for her on.

A little while of doing this seemed to build his confidence up and he would do it all on his own. He did one day do a buttons up on the romper outside of the leggins she had one but it was worth the laugh.

So hang in there ladies, it is a tough struggle but the more exposure they get to it the more confidence they get... If not you can always pull the "we created this child together, you have to do half the work" if they say no then re negotiate it and say ok "I will do 90% and you do 10%"it makes it sound like they are getting an awesome deal but we know in fact is just enough to stop us going crazy!!!