Hi All

It is my first time posting and also my first pregnancy...

I am 8 weeks pregnant and honestly feeling absolutely awful. I am nauseous all day and not able to eat anything but fruit and bread, I am incredibly grumpy and not sleeping very well. Now I understand that this is all part of the fun but I am reaching my wits ends...

This pregnancy was certainly not planned and I having a lot of trouble adjusting. Has anyone gone through this aswell when it is not planned at all?

Any tips or similar stories would be greatly appreciated, I know I am certainly not the only person feeling like this (although it feels like it at the moment)...

It is horrible, I haven't even felt excited telling the few people so far...

Help!

Tess

Hi Tess,

Don't worry, what you are feeling is normal and I went through exactly the same. This is my first pregnancy and I'm now 9 1/2 weeks. I found out when I was 5 weeks right in the middle of exams at uni. I still have not reached the stage where I'm excited about it, as all I can think about right now is how to re-organise our future to fit this little bundle into our lives. We wanted children but I got old I coulnd't get pregnant due to PCOS, and wasn't he wrong!

My friends & family are all so excited & I'm just not feeling it. I'm sure I will get there eventually but it is a massive adjustment.

I spent about 2 weeks feeling shitty like you, just felt like crap all day and everything made me feel sick. All I can say is just eat what you can and don't worry about if it's healthy or whatever just now. I realised that not eating was the worst, so even if you have to eat bread at every meal just do it. Hot chips were also my saviour and try to keep up the fruit for some fibre.

If you don't mind me asking, do you have a partner & is he supportive? Mine has been, although he has no idea about pregnancy or babies.

Anyway I hope you feel a bit better, you are not the only one feeling like that.

Aimee

Hey Tess, Sorry to hear you feel this way!

This is our first baby to and its so scary. From the moment i took the pregnancy test(about 11 weeks) til 16 weeks i think i cried almost everyday, I was so nervous and terrified as me and DP are only 20 and 23 and werent planning on children for at least another 3 years.

I found it really hard to communicate with DP about what we were going to do but came to the decision to continue the pregnancy. Once i finally started telling family at 16 weeks it made it so much easier as they were WAY more supportive than i had initially thought.

It does get easier and now DP and I are so excited to become parents even though its going to be hard.

If you need to talk or just vent im here smile
Steph

this is really what I needed to hear, that what I am feeling is "normal" right now.

I found out a month ago after I had only been at my new job (which I spent 4 months looking for) for 6 weeks. I think this is the main thing that is worrying me. I love my job and don't want to give it up but I know that they don't have to hold it for me.

Yes I have a partner and he has been amazing (though similar to yours, he has no idea about what is going on) He is being very helpful though he is worried about me not eating properly and I jsut can't seem to get him to understand that I just can't get certain foods down at all...

I am such a big planner and like being in control and for once in my life I have absolutely NO control over what is happening. I have made all these plans and they now all have to be changed.

Urgh I just want to wake up one day and feel normal again lol i just feel sorry for everyone who has to be around me at the moment, I am not very pleasant haha

What you are feeling is totally normal! I know it doesn't feel normal and you feel like crap but that is all part of pregnancy. And just remember you've never felt any of these emotions or feeling before. So the way you are feeling is totally normal.

I am 29 weeks pregnant, and I can honestly say that I only started getting excited about the baby when I was about 20 weeks along. Now I CAN NOT WAIT TO MEET MY LITTLE BABY.

But that was the LONGEST, LONGEST 20 weeks of my LIFE! I think i have probably cried at least twice a week from 6 weeks to 15 weeks. I now probably cry close to once every fortnight (pregnancy emotions).

Your life has changed forever, and will never be the same, and your body is now not only yours, but a babies as well. Its normal for you to feel like crap, even though people portray pregnancy as BLISS..... pffftttt bliss... who the hell are these people that say pregnancy is bliss. ITS NOT BLISS, yes getting a baby at the end is bliss, but what you have to go trough to get the baby, that is not BLISS!!

I have found nothing bliss about pregnancy apart from a few things.
1 - Getting bigger boobs
2 - Feeling bub move, amazing!
3 - Seeing bub on scan, double amazing!

People say that the first trimest is the worse, second is fantastic and third is crap again.

I was not like this. I found, first - CRAP, second - CRAP, third - FANTASTIC!!!

Hi Steph

Thanks for your reply...I am only 22 so I can completely relate. it is going to be such a big change in our lifestyle. We are not party animals by any means but we like being able to do what we want when we want etc. We were planning for holidays and festivals and now that has all changed...

My family and his have been very supportive, it's just me who is making things hard lol

You sound like me at 8weeks lol. I was soooooo sick (like indescribably sick...felt like i was dying and nobody believed me about how bad i felt lol). 24/7 nausea,couldnt even keep down water. Had 6weeks off wrk between weeks 9 and 15. because i kept spewing at wrk too much. couldnt focus on anything. Spent my days in bed or with my face in the toliet bowl throwing up:(

I felt real weird telling ppl that i was pregnant. Like i wass so distant from the fact. ppl would ask me if i was excited, and i felt horrible when i didnt feel that way. i was grumpy, and felt tired and run down. Had no energy because everything was being thrown up. Everyone would give me tips on how to get past the nausea...and nothing worked. I tried everything!

Im 19weeks now and the reality is finally sinking in lol. But only since ive started to feel my baby move in the past week...And i had my anatomy scan today,and found out im having a boy (even in my 1st scan i felt weird, the scan lady kept asking me 'if i was ok', because i was very quiet. I just wasnt excited at that stage and i was trying not to throw up as she pressed the scan hand-held piece down hard on my tummy). The scan was pretty cool....my partner looked pretty excited (it wasnt planned, and we still worry about things to come when baby arrives) but seeing my partner turn to me and smile after watching the screen (when i didnt think he would) really made me feel better about this pregnancy:) My baby is perfect and healthy,and now ive realized it to be more of a blessing than an 'unplanned mistake'.

thank you for all your replies...it certainly makes me feel better knowing that everything is normal. Maybe not "bliss" but normal lol

There is just SO much to think about and organise. It is daunting.

I am also worried as I am not "skinny" person by any means. I don't care about putting weight on as I can get rid of that but I am worried about not being able to feel my baby as early as other mothers etcs, has anyone else felt like this?

Cleary I am 25 years old, and I am by no means a party animal either, but I have found the social aspects of pregnancy the pits. I am too tired to do anything with friends, and when I am not tired, my friends are too drunk for me to enjoy their company.

My advice for you is find a pregnancy group!!! Check out your hospital and ask them where you can find some mummies to be the same stage as you.

I am 25kgs over weight. I have felt bub move inside of me since about 17 weeks. A friend of mine who is also pregnant and not overweight still hasn't felt her bub yet and she is 18 weeks. My partner can now see bub kick my stomach and make big buldges, since about 25 weeks.

P.S- My sister who has a wonderful relationship with her husband gave me some brilliant advice a couple months ago. She just simply said, it doesn't matter how much your partner cares for you during pregancy, they will NEVER know what its like to be pregnant and the sacrafices you have to make. I am still coming to terms with all of the sacrafices I have made for this little human that i haven't met. But the further along i get the more i am convienced that is all very well worth it!

EDIT: Sorry forgot to add, I am an organisational FREAK, i have to have everything organised otherwise i think my world is coming crumbling down. I spoke to my doctor about this, and he agreed to book all of my appointments in advanced, and my midwife/antenatal classes. I also purchased majority of my baby gear in first trimester and set room up. I also am about to pack my hospital bag next week, even though they don't recommend doing it till 35 weeks. I SAY NEVER CAN BE TOO ORGANISED. Maybe do this it might help with feeling very unorganised.

Sorry for the novel, but you sound exactly how i was feeling, and some days still do feel.
[Edited on 21/12/2009]

thank you all so much ladies...this is why I love forums like this so much. So many people to relate too...

Also how can I get one of those little time line thingy's at the bottom of your posts? =)

http://lilypie.com/create.html

Its pretty much self explanatory how to make it, when posting as your signature just use *img]http://lbdf.lilypie.com/rGBJp13.png/*img] from the forum signature, PseudoHTML, UBBCode and BB Code setting( minus the *s). You'll get your own little code thing when youve completed it ive just given you an example so you have an idea smile

Go to lilypie.com. follow the easy steps.

Then when you get to the end (which is called 'ticker code snippets')... you look down for the bit that says 'forum signatures' and look along to the part that says 'PseudoHTML, UBBCode and BB Code' and click on that.

a big code will come up and you need to cut and paste this on your huggies club profile details under the heading that says'forum details' in the space after the part that says 'signature'

Then this gets a lil confusing to explain....there are two parts in the code that say... [img] You need to delete all the part at the front of the code before the first [img] and all the part at the end of code after the 2nd [img] But do not delete the parts that say [img] as these need to be included in the code

Then click on 'update details'

this is my 3rd baby and im 40 im petrified its been 10 yrs since my last bubs but i just roll with it just eat healthy stay away from take away trust me u will feel better and enjoy it and try not to stress coz u will stress the bubs and im not skinny either but i dont care theres just more of me to love

I'm 27 and onto my 3rd.
I absolutely HATE being pregnant. There's nothing I enjoy about it except losing weight wink

I'm sick every single day til the squirmy little buggers come out and then I start to feel better about it all.
I love love love my kidlets, but I was very happy with the two I have and was ready to get desexed when DH decided he wanted one more.. so here I am.
I often get feelings of resentment which makes me unhappy, but it's just the way I feel! I don't like being pregnant and I wish he could experience this, just for a week, to understand what I'm going thru - he has absolutely no idea!!!
Drives me batty.
Plus my 3.8yr old has got the biggest attitude at the moment which is driving me bonkers..

Ah, family life is such bliss!! LOL

Honestly tho - I wouldn't change anything - my kids are my everything and I love them to pieces.. just really don't like the process of getting them here! lol

So yes, what you are feeling is totally normal. It is hard work being pregnant - not everything finds it easy or enjoyable so don't feel bad or guilty if you feel like you hate it..

Having a child is the most life-changing experience ever, but it's the best one too.. it can just take a little getting used to!

Anyhoo, this place is a great place to vent coz there's so many people on here who totally understand where you're coming from.
And there's heaps of good (and not so good) advice too..
My main pointer - eat whatever doesn't make you feel ill to think of..

Best of luck with the rest of it!

You sound exactly like me with my first. I had just finished uni and had been offered a great job starting the following April, then mid January I started feeling off for weeks at a time. I was on the pill so didn't even factor in pregnancy. It was a huge shock when the doc said I was pregnant as All I could think of was what was going to happen to me and my great new job. My DH was over the moon and really supportive as were both families but I was in shock for weeks. Eventually I rang my new employers and put it all out there,explained everything and surprisingly they were great. They were impressed by how honest I was. They moved my starting date back to the beginning of Feb. and organised unpaid maternity leave for me and they kept my job which was great.
I got excited after the 18 week ultrasound and have since gone on to have 4 babies. I now think it was fate and wouldn't change anything for the world.

Best of luck with your bubs.

I am a 'larger' girl and i felt my first move before my BF who two weeks further along than me - this time round i felt it move at just after 15 weeks so don't worry about that you will feel it!! The only thing i will say is that it was longer before my husband could feel it as bubba had to kick through my layer of protective insulation!!!LOL

It makes me sad that our partners can never really know what it's like for us to go through pregnancy.... not that I would want them to go through all the awfull stuff, but just at least appreciate what it's like for us.

Anywho that was a random aside...... I was just wondering how Tess is going now? Hoping things are starting to get easier smile

Hiya

Luckily I am feeling MUCH better about the pregnancy as a whole but still feeling quite sick not really able to eat a whole deal.

We have told a few more people which is making things a lot more real and exciting, I guess the only thing I am worrying about now is that I keep thinking that something is going to go wrong and there won't be a heart beat or anything at our 12 week scan but apparently this is quite normal as well.

Thanks for checking in, these forums really are great! Just looking through the questions already raised has been really helpful...

Tess =)

Hi Cleary, I'm preg with my first almost 11 weeks now, having my 12 week/nuchal scan next friday which i'm starting to find a little daunting now also.
I'm finding these forums great to relate to! I'm sooo sick atm, confused at whether it's nausea or heartburn now?? Or hell it's probably both. Work haven't been the easiest atm, does anyone else have issues with work? I had a week sick leave a couple weeks back and have taken all my annual leave atm to give me a chance to get over this first trimester. My supervisor didn't know if i could have the day off to go to my scan next week had to (get back to me about it) and has now told me we have to have a 'chat' when i get back to work. That's making it even harder for me atm. I'm 24 and have worked there for over 6 years so friendships are going down the drain. Cleary have you had any scans at all? Anyone else getting married 6 weeks after the bub is due? Haha, well call me crazy i've had my wedding booked in for about 6 months now and then found i'm pregnant. So i'm scared about weight gain as well. I'll stop rambling now anyway smile

when you are over the first trimester bump you will start to feel better, nausea doesn't make anyone happy! As soon as that starts to ease, you will get your energy back and then you will be eagerly awaiting your new baby!I suppose in a way early pregnancy doesn't feel too real, always sick and irritable, when you start feeling the baby move, you will have a different view! Good Luck!

I went through the same thing with my daughter. She wasn't planned and i had no idea i was pregnant until i was about 7 weeks! I just thought i was a bit sick and it would pass ...nope.. haha.
The first while is hard when it's not a planned pregnancy. I went through about a month of wondering what i should do and it was so stressful.. I'm glad i decided to keep the baby and now i have my amazing little girl!
You will start getting really emotional and fall in love with the baby within another couple months and then this part will seem like nothing. Don't worry. It will pass and things will get better! Personally, from about 5 months i felt the best i had felt in my life. So full of energy and just in a great mood =)
Happy to talk more if you need. I didn't really have anyone to talk to when i was pregnant first time and it's really hard..

Another thing. While you can, sleep as much as you need! Don't feel lazy or let anyone else make you feel lazy. If you have another baby later, you won't have the chance to rest like you can now. Make the most of your first pregnancy and do anything you need to do! =)